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Thread: childfree + friend with kids?

  1. #16
    to the loneliest city in the world other pete's Avatar
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    How can this photographer even tell if her kids are in their rooms??
    (unless she is Making A Point)

  2. #17
    Who's Deanna? SparkleMotion's Avatar
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    You know those pants that have a word written across the ass? I saw one on a girl who could have been no more than nine. It said "Juicy."

  3. #18
    bubble in a soundwave sara's Avatar
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    ^ EW.

  4. #19
    whack ass bitch forever Autumn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SparkleMotion View Post
    You know those pants that have a word written across the ass? I saw one on a girl who could have been no more than nine. It said "Juicy."
    It's a brand name, but it doesn't make it any less perverted. I'm pretty sure Juicy Couture is made for adults, not nine-year olds. I'm sure her mother had an excuse on the ready, because surely she realized the pants were slightly innappropriate and bound to raise eyebrows. Surely.

  5. #20
    skeptic. Chalk's Avatar
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    ^^One would think so... I bet the mother thinks it's "cute", and that she has the same one in her size.

  6. #21
    authentic hotdog cart vendor Frangipani's Avatar
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    I was out with some friends for the second time in 5 months and the last thing i wanted to do was talk about the baby, so much so that they were wondering if i even liked the baby! of course i do, but i didnt drop a buck fiddy on a babysitter to be able to go out and hang with the girls only to talk about the thing i've been trying to escape.

    I also love how my family and husband thinks that now that i have a kid, anyone with a kid will be a great friend! Seriously, i've had to fight with my husband, telling him that I am NOT going to be best friends with his co workers wife now that she is pregnant. If he invites them over to the house one more time i will kill most likely a LOT of people.
    Slippin' on my red dress, putting on my make-up

  7. #22
    And it's snowing. tivoklr's Avatar
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    We're sorry. Sorrryyy...

    As someone who is wholly guilty of talking about my kids way too much, I have to say, in defense of parents of children everywhere that "having children is fucking nuts, not sometimes, but a lot, and mostly I find myself talking about them to vent, in what seems an 'aren't my insane bundles of joy just great'?"

    As my girls are getting a little older, 7 and 4, it's improving a lot. The overwhelming nature of keeping them alive for the first 2 years, or until they can pretty much eat and use the toilet is as was said above, all consuming.

    I'm sorry...I know how annoying it is, I can tell. This thread actually is inspiring me to be more me. Thanks!

  8. #23
    the reichenbach hero fox in socks's Avatar
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    obviously anything thats a huge part of your life is going to be a huge part of your conversation subject matter. house, kids, spouse, job, whatever. its annoying across the board, though, when someone is totally consumed by any of those things and expects you to ride along. dont get me wrong, ive had friends who turn into suck when they have a new partner or something (which just like kids-all-the-time-talk gets totally tiring to listen to). as tivoklr said, as they get older, it can get better, but just like any relationship, you have to invest in it, you know, if you wants those friends to stick around for those first couple years. or if you want them to.

    its funny, i overheard this conversation yesterday between two men, from an apparently seasoned parent to a soon-to-be parent giving some advice. most amusing was seasoned parent saying "we only see our friends without kids like once a year. friends with kids, we see more often". the soon-to-be said (sarcastically obs) "wow. youre really selling it to me." its an interesting cultural thing i think, especially since we live in a time when many have the choice and some choose not to have children. interesting indeed.

  9. #24
    My siblings and I all have cats and we talk to each other about them in much the way you might talk about your kids. Sometimes I forget if we are joking or not.
    Example conversation:

    Sister-In-Law: "Ava is so adorable, but she's not very bright. Sometimes we put an upturned laundry basket over her and she can't figure out how to get out from underneath it so she just pushes it around like a little retarded turtle."
    Me: "Aww, what an adorable dumbass! Boo is such a little terror. Just to annoy me, she stands at my bookshelf and watches me as she pulls each book off one by one for no goddamn reason. Cats!"

    Does that count?

    But really, I only have a couple of friends that have kids. One of them fell off the face of the earth, and the other is still one of my best friends in the world. Although she is busier, her personality never changed a bit, she's still just as kickass. So, I know it CAN work, but I also know that the vast majority of stories that I've heard are of people having kids and never being the same again. Or just never being seen again.
    I love you, Kenwood! Why don't you come back home to TGS and pick the peas out of my fried rice? And the rice. I just want carrots.

  10. #25
    Make it Pink Medusa's Avatar
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    It's really just a question of knowing your audience and not overwhelming with info. I have plenty of FB friends with kids and they'll post pictures of their kids here and there, and maybe complain a bit about something coming up, but it's not EVERY SINGLE THING THEY SAY.

    The friends who talk about nothing else but their children, the cute thing in their child's diaper, and the horrible thing someone said about their child get hidden in my feed just as quickly as the people who have absolutely nothing to say unless it involves football.

  11. #26
    The New Classic marci's Avatar
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    Two of my (who once were) bestest friends now have three children and I rarely speak with either of them.

    When I would visit home, K was usually the only person that I went out of my way to meet up with. We always kept in touch, but that no longer is the case. I don't want to have to see her children. The last time she brought her kids over last straw for me, but I didn't want to say anything to offend her. When we made plans after that, I always tried to have us go out to dinner or to the movies, so she would not bring her kids along. I know she would be upset with me if I told her, so I've kept mum about it. The other thing that bugs me completely comes with the territory of being a mother and I understand, but always canceling plans due to one of the kids being sick has grown a bit annoying. We mainly just talk through Facebook these days, but it's infrequent. Every status update and photo posting (which tend to occur daily) have been about the kids. I'm happy that she's happy being a mom, but seriously? STFU!

    I stopped speaking to my other friend mainly because she became incredibly selfish and never let me get a word in about myself. Once she became divorced, she moved out on her own and always had a new boyfriend to tell me about. Her apartment was always dirty and her children were terribly behaved. She yelled at them more than she spoke with me. The kids would eat lunch meat with their hands and then try to touch me. Ewwwww. It's been enough to keep me away!

  12. #27
    Junior Member Lily's Avatar
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    Hi,
    New here. I have a few friends with children and naturally, I don't see them very often, because they are so occupied with them. They don't pressure us to have children like my husband's friends who have reproduced though. It can get get VERY annoying and they're really only asking us so that we can have 'playdates' together.

  13. #28
    The Good Book is missing some pages Maeve's Avatar
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    This is an interesting topic and I think that dynamics like this occur whenever there's a major change in someone's life.

    For example: I'm not married.
    I noticed that those among my friends who got married became more absent.
    I don't have any kind of trouble or prejudice hanging out with married people but I can't help admitting that the largest part of my time is spent with others in a situation similar to mine on various aspects, even this: sometimes it's my fault, sometimes it's theirs, sometimes lives take different courses and no matter what you want, you have to adapt and the adaptation sometimes leads to the loss of some friends along the way.

    Marriage is a big change, a baby is a bigger one.
    I don't have many friends who have children, just two, but I can say that the separation began with their married life, way before their becoming parents.

    Is it right, butterfly, they like you better framed and dried?

  14. #29
    the reichenbach hero fox in socks's Avatar
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    ^this is definitely true. some people lose their identify to kids, some to marriage.

  15. #30
    she said destroy Lágnætti's Avatar
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    Maeve, I agree. I've parted company with friends who married and suddenly became offensively couple-centric. You know, the type who suddenly find it problematic to invite single people to their parties, or only do so to try and heavy-handedly matchmake them with other people whose singleness offends them. Then there's when you find every single time you get together you're just used an a sounding board for their complaints about their other half. It's insulting and even worse, boring as hell.

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