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Thread: The entertainment industry's unstoppable bullshit machine

  1. #571
    Remember. Steve SFM's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Perky Compson View Post
    The biggest threat to the #MeToo movement is fucking rapists and their desire to keep power. "This victim's story doesn't meet my standards, so it's a disgrace to survivors everywhere" is just concern-trolling.
    EXACTLY. I guess the HLN anchor Ashleigh Banfield trotted out this line last night and....no. A disagreement between people as to what constitutes assault does NOT destroy the movement. Indeed, it sounds to me like an important thing to discuss. Personally, I found the story horrifying. It may not technically break the law, but IMO Ansari deserves all the shit that he’s getting. If we are truly trying to create a new reality for the treatment of women, something like this should be seen as unacceptable.
    At my core, I think we're gonna be OK.

    Barack Hussein Obama

  2. #572
    trapped in the worst timeline just owls's Avatar
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    She repeatedly asked him to slow down. He said he would and kept going. She removed her hand from his crotch. He put it back.

    This stuff might be typical "bad date" behavior. That's a problem. It doesn't mean it's just an uncomfortable experience because it's common. The fact that this type of behavior is so easily dismissed as something one can expect to happen on a bad date is a very big fucking problem. A bad date should be someone being rude to a waiter or talking over you or chewing with their mouth open, not repeatedly showing they do not respect your sexual boundaries.

  3. #573
    Senior Member JAE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BrotherNamedErised View Post
    I'm sorry, I read and re-read the Babe piece, trying to piece together what happened to this woman. I'm sorry that "Grace" had a bad date, which she is referring to as the worst night of her life. And, yes, it's certainly upsetting that yet another guy turned out to be oafish and self-absorbed. But she was not assaulted. This is a grown woman accusing a guy of not reading her mind. She had an uncomfortable sexual experience that she walked away from, even if she took her sweet time to do even that. She does not get to diminish the ongoing movement of actual survivors of horrific abuse stepping up and sharing their stories. The fact that so many readers can't see that this is a blatant grab for 15 minutes' worth of attention just blows me away. People like "Grace" are the biggest threat to everything that #MeToo has stood for.
    He didn't have to be a mind reader because she specifically told him (even ignoring the multiple physical actions she described that any reasonable person should be able to decipher as meaning obvious discomfort).

    This whole issue and the global discussion we're having right now transcends simple legal definitions and what falls inside or outside of the law - Aziz is not in court. It's about behaviour that is unacceptable and the unreasonable entitlement that some people feel they have over someone else's body, life and autonomy.

  4. #574
    trapped in the worst timeline just owls's Avatar
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    I think this article does a great job at explaining why so many (women) are having trouble acknowleding what happened to "Grace" as assault in any way.

    Women have already taken enough of a painful personal inventory to be able to say #metoo; I am not eager to go back over what I've come to comfortably accept as "crappy hookups," or "shitty sex," and come to realize that yes, that was sexual assault too.

    If we begin to call all sexual assault what it is, we will have to voluntarily admit more pain into our lives, pain that we have up to this point refused to let in the door. If we call this kind of sexual encounter an assault, then women who have been weathering what they call bad sex will suddenly have justification for the icky feelings and shame that follows them home in the cab. And yet, we'd really rather just hit the showers.

    I've taken that cab, crying. And I've taken that shower. And I would never have told the story, because I would have been afraid of someone thinking, "That's not that bad," the way I just fucking did. I don't have to imagine what happened to Grace because I remember it.

  5. #575
    Only knows desire. Perky Compson's Avatar
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    But guys, it's very important that we don't criticize men who have sex with women they know don't want to have sex!

    Here's an edifying post for why the "misread the situation" excuse is garbage.

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