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Thread: Tales of Everyday Homophobia

  1. #1

    Tales of Everyday Homophobia

    We had this thread at the Other Place, and I thought it was a great place to let off steam about homophobia and anyone with a general lack of tolerance.

    Today my city had its first Gay Pride Parade. A local group submitted a request to host the parade last year and the mayor granted the request (but only after consulting with an attorney, who basically told him he had no choice because it was their constitutional right). The mayor made it vehemently clear that he had no choice but to allow it, without ever actually coming out and saying that he didn't want to do it. My city is probably like 98% right wing Christian conservatives, so you can imagine how this went over. There's an article about the parade on the paper's webpage with the following sentence:

    Amid all of the flamboyancy, there were some worthy aspects of the festival.
    REALLY?! How so very open-minded of you, to be able to look past the GAYNESS of the parade and find something WORTHY. I bet you brag about having a black friend, too.

    I was in south Georgia today for a birthday party, so I didn't attend. The topic came up, when my SIL's mother said, "You know I'm missing the Gay Pride Parade to be here today, right?" and rolled her eyes. She acted all annoyed and went on to say, "Well, you know the mayor said he had to let them do it, but you know they had already given money to-"... At which point I interrupted to declare that they did, in fact, have a constitutional right to host the parade and that I really didn't see why anyone should give a shit anyway. The conversation ended there because none of those un-educated, bigoted women have the balls to stand up for their own fucked-up opinions. They just looked at me in horror and changed the subject.

  2. #2
    I can't believe the paper's website actually published that sentence in an article. Unbelievable. And you're right: people shouldn't give a shit about what gay people are doing. People like that spend more time thinking about gay people than gay people do!

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    why is flamboyancy such a huge issue for people?

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    Curious Hedgehog Tarendai's Avatar
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    because flamboyant people have a habit of redecorating your house when your on holiday

    GSV Tarendai

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    ANUSTART Lathan's Avatar
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    Homophobia? Everyday homophobia? I don't know. But the Gay Men's Health Crisis in NYC was searching for a new home, and this part of the article was troubling:

    After a two-year-plus search for a new home -- during which it was turned down by numerous property owners -- the Gay Men's Health Crisis will be moving...

    "So many owners rejected our use," said Arthur Mirante, of Cushman & Wakefield, who led the brokerage search for GMHC. "I was surprised and disappointed in my real estate colleagues."
    Really? You're going to turn down tenants (tenants trying to help people!) in the current real estate market? Douchebags.

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    Quote Originally Posted by JayPea View Post
    I was in south Georgia today for a birthday party, so I didn't attend. The topic came up, when my SIL's mother said, "You know I'm missing the Gay Pride Parade to be here today, right?" and rolled her eyes. She acted all annoyed and went on to say, "Well, you know the mayor said he had to let them do it, but you know they had already given money to-"... At which point I interrupted to declare that they did, in fact, have a constitutional right to host the parade and that I really didn't see why anyone should give a shit anyway. The conversation ended there because none of those un-educated, bigoted women have the balls to stand up for their own fucked-up opinions. They just looked at me in horror and changed the subject.
    I fucking love that you did that. The bulk of my family is incredibly narrow-minded and bigoted, but unlike you I usually back down because I guess I feel out-numbered. But good for you for just barreling ahead and shutting them right the hell down, I wish I could do that.

  7. #7
    she said destroy Lágnætti's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pan View Post
    why is flamboyancy such a huge issue for people?
    I think it goes along with the whole flaunting it thing that so many twits cite as their one big problem with gays. You know, the old 'I don't mind gays as long as they're not flaunting it!' thing. In other words, they're all right with gay people existing as long as they don't ever have to see any remote evidence of that existence.

    It's either that or they don't like parades, costumes and glitter. Given the popularity of Disneyland amongst straight folks though, I'd wager that's not the case.

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    condemned to wires and hammers ebby's Avatar
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    ^ I have gay friends who "don't do pride parades" because they don't agree with the flamboyant nature of it. I always counter argue that the parade is representative of any lgbt people or their supporters who choose to be in the parade. There's as many "normal" gays are there are flamboyantly dressed ones.

    I personally think that it's often a remnant of their own homophobia coming out in them, or a shame of being associated with the "camp gays" or whatever. That always bothers me as much as the lgbt folk who think Pride is just a party and nothing else - it's an interesting multifaceted festival/parade in my opinion. It celebrates the rights that lgbt have managed to obtain, and the strength of the community being open enough to represent themselves and celebrate their diversity in a public space, while at the same time reminding the wider community that lgbt people exist, and also contains a political element demanding full equality.

    The lgbt community itself is so diverse, so naturally the parades should be too.

    We were due to have a counter-protest at the dublin pride parade yesterday from the "lovely" ultra-conservative, religious group COIR. But I didn't see anyone, and I just heard through a friend that they were arrested before the parade kicked off? I'm trying to find out exactly what happened, or whether that's just rumour and conjecture. A friend of mine works in a minister's office here, and they had a meeting with Coir, who wanted to express their concerns over the (half assed) Civil Partnership proposals, which turned into an outpouring of homophobic tirades that didn't even abate when one of the minister's staff stood up and said that he was gay and that the language being used wasn't appropriate for any civil discussion.


    (I'm really tired, and I'm actually not sure this post made any coherent sense. My apologies.)

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    Member civilised syllabub's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ebby View Post
    ^ I have gay friends who "don't do pride parades" because they don't agree with the flamboyant nature of it. I always counter argue that the parade is representative of any lgbt people or their supporters who choose to be in the parade. There's as many "normal" gays are there are flamboyantly dressed ones.
    Exactly, and if they still complain that flamboyancy is overrepresented at parades, then surely that's all the more reason for non-flamboyant gays to attend and ensure greater diversity of representation.

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    Curious Hedgehog Tarendai's Avatar
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    I remember going to the michael causer memorial, and being told online that I shouldnt go by a gay friend down in brighton because it would make me visible and likely to suffer the same fate, and I was better off being silent as it just wasn't that kind of world where you could be accepted openly. Which I said was a load of tosh, and even if it were true it would then be important to show support in order to instigate change. So far nothing has happened to me since.
    GSV Tarendai

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    Insert something clever here iamstilljamiepoo's Avatar
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    My city had the parade this past weekend, too. Of course, the comments section after the story covering was littered with nasty comments. My favorite:
    I don't understand why THEY have to have a parade. You don't see a white people pride parade, do you?

    *headdesk*

  12. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by iamstilljamiepoo View Post
    I don't understand why THEY have to have a parade. You don't see a white people pride parade, do you?
    Yeah huh, it's called a KKK parade/rally and we just had one of those, too. What a dumbass.

    I really had to quit reading that shit on our newspaper's site. I knew there were a lot of lame bigots in my town, but I honestly did not realize how many there were, nor how deep their bigotry runs.

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    flayed on the marble stairs
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    I've pretty much made it a rule to never read the comments on any news article concerning homosexuality. It makes me want to do bad things.

    I'm also really sick and tired of the flamboyancy argument . It just makes absolutely no sense to me, especially the whole "YOU'RE PERPETUATING THE NEGATIVE STEREOTYPE OF GAYS!" spiel. Err, what stereotype? What, exactly, is wrong with being flamboyant? It sounds like you have a problem with homosexuality, and not the other way around. Grr.

  14. #14
    Curious Hedgehog Tarendai's Avatar
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    I think its more the shallow rude people who shit stir who seem to flood to the gay scene, than the gay scene itself, I've known some very intelligent polite scene people, hardly the sort you'd accuse of perpetuating a negative stereotype
    GSV Tarendai

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    aging hipster trash The Seaward's Avatar
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    i'll be counter-protesting shirley phelps-roper's protest @ the holocaust museum (yes, you read that correctly) in dallas on friday.

    i'll letcha all know how it goes. a few friends and i have decided to make out within visible distance of the little troll.
    I don't understand the question, and I won't respond to it.

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