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Thread: A message about Unforumzed

  1. #121
    Senior Member eresos's Avatar
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    I don’t post much anymore, but I still love this place.
    All the tori chatter, but also discovered so many other great artists here, and always great discussion on so many topics
    So appreciative that it’s still around after all these years.
    There will be no substitute.
    Going to miss it awful
    "this way, that way, i am of two minds" -sappho
    http://classicpersuasion.org/pw/sappho/index.htm

  2. #122
    Let them eat cheese flan Nancy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JAE View Post
    It's taken me a while to post in this thread because I wanted time to reflect on everything and gather my thoughts.

    This is a hugely sad announcement but not surprising to me - the Internet has changed massively since the glory days of fan forums and it was only a matter of time before @/unf got swept away too. I lurked and joined back during the time between Scarlet and TBK and at that time I was involved in several forums based on things that I loved.

    It's quite ironic in the era of social media to look back at that time and envy the sense of community and shared history that drove those forums back then - it's something that I don't experience today on social media in the same way. Each of those forums was a vibrant community that felt almost like a self contained city with various hang out spots, from the major public spaces to the more niche and alternative areas. Those communities also felt very "real" because they spawned their own mythologies, histories and even languages (a lot of people have referenced aspects of @ and unf history and mythology already that will always live with me and be impossible to explain to anyone else).

    These communities also inevitably came with their hierarchies, and there were more "famous" posters that stood out because of their personalities or alliances, or "old-timers" who earned their status through the length of time they'd been around or their number of posts. I know there have always been complaints of cliques, and this was common across all my online homes (that's just a natural part of humans organising together) but something I always felt about @ was that while it could be quite hard to break into, once you "got" the snark and if you were confident enough to back up your own views, it felt a lot more open minded than other places overall.

    The snark itself was infamous and unique and was part of the reason it became one of my favourite places to visit. As the years moved on and society changed (and yes, the average age of users probably got older) it died down significantly and I'd say most of us (even ones who were there at the time) would be shocked at how different it used to be and how direct and cutting some of the comments could be (speaking as someone who felt the hot end of more than one old fashioned flame war). I can see how many people wouldn't like that or might have been scared off by it but I loved it and I miss it, because people weren't treated with kid gloves and I think it made everyone slightly more resilient and feel like they'd "earned" their position in the community. Even from a practical perspective, it took WORK to be part of that community because you weren't accessing that shit on your phone in between checking Facebook - I remember sitting for hours in the evenings after school and work sitting at my desktop computer checking into the forums.

    It absolutely was not an echo chamber despite most of us having similar views on major political issues, and as much as there was a hierarchy of users, this didn't mean that anyone was untouchable or unaccountable for their views or words. It's strange looking back on this as we all live in our own curated echo chambers online now.

    In saying that, Unf became a much more mellow place and to be honest it's maybe no bad thing given how the world has changed. This place has been a real support network and oasis of sanity over the past few horrible years and I think others probably feel a similar way.

    My love of Tori Amos isn't the same as it was when I was a teen and I'm OK with that - I really enjoyed the last album and I still love all the classics but I just don't feel motivated to talk about her the way I used to. This place evolved into something more than that and to be honest I haven't ever really thought of Unf in particular as a Tori Amos forum. In saying that, I'm sure it'll feel very weird when the next album comes out and I don't have this place to visit.

    All my online communities eventually died off (most of them over a decade ago) and this is the last of those types of places that I check into. The collapse of @ and evolution into Unf was another really interesting and vibrant time period and I'm so glad that the community was allowed to wind down the way it has rather than collapse in a sea of drama or through shady dealings like some others I was a member of did. I also appreciate that we have these last few months with a bit of warning to reflect on everything and make arrangements to stay in touch with people etc.

    I know I'm waffling but I also do need to talk about these forums as a sanctuary for this closeted teenager in Belfast and as an important queer space. It felt amazing to have a community where I felt welcome and where I could talk about things that I couldn't "IRL". These were some of the first interactions I had with other queer people where I felt like I could be myself (ironic behind a username and avatar) and talk about things that I liked on an equal footing with them, without being ashamed or worried that I would be exposed as being gay. It was a place where I truly discovered what I liked and didn't like (culturally, socially, politically) purely on its own terms. It's not an exaggeration to say that the openly gay man in his mid 30s currently writing this wouldn't have been the same person without that space and the people I interacted with.

    In closing I would like to say a massive thanks to Ryan in particular (and the mods and everyone who has worked on these places) for being a huge part of the creation and maintenance of this community that has been such a formative and important part of my life and development. I've always tried to contribute financially where possible and the impact the place still has on me is not reflected in my post count which is low these days - I still check in here at least once a day and its one of the only websites (rather than apps) that I still use. Thanks also to all those people and users who have been a part of this community - you'll never know the impact each of you have had on me just by existing and posting. Most people aren't here any more and even seeing old usernames is giving me bolts of nostalgia and memories (I have to mention Rachel who I considered to be a good friend and I still miss terribly). I am so sad that this is all coming to an end but I appreciate that it's the right time - I'll still laugh at all those old jokes and memes (the ones I can remember) and I'll cherish my memories of what we all built together.

    I'm on one of (I don't know if there are multiple ones) the Facebook group/s and I'll certainly check out any future developments such as Reddit, however I can't see anything replacing this place in a similar way. If any of the people who recognise me would personally like to stay in touch (and I appreciate that my lack of posting over the past few years means that number is likely to be low) please send me a wee PM and I can share Facebook or WhatsApp details or whatever's relevant.

    So long and thanks for all the fish ❤

  3. #123
    Loves ponies. Hates phonies. Regina Phalange's Avatar
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    I just woke up from an odd dream. There was a new album with this weird gothic/steampunky video starring Dennis Quaid as some creepy villain and we were all freaking out waiting for the rest of the clips.

    I've done new album time alone offline. I've done new album time on other forums. But my favorite is here with you guys. People who are gonna hate it, people who are gonna love it. People who take it as serious as 90s output, people who listen once and never again.

    And even if it weren't closing, I don't know if it would be the same next new album anyway. More and more of us drift away not just from this forum, not just from forums in general, but from Tori fandom all together.

  4. #124
    Senior Member venusunfolding's Avatar
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    Reading through this thread tonight and seeing so many familiar names has been a joy.

    A majority of the people I interact with most on the internet are still people from this forum. I haven't posted here as much as I did on @, but I pop in once in a while. It's been an amazing ride. Ryan, thanks for everything you've done to keep it going.

    I have all the feels now.

  5. #125
    Senior Member Jezebelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Regina Phalange View Post

    I've done new album time alone offline. I've done new album time on other forums. But my favorite is here with you guys. People who are gonna hate it, people who are gonna love it. People who take it as serious as 90s output, people who listen once and never again.

    And even if it weren't closing, I don't know if it would be the same next new album anyway. More and more of us drift away not just from this forum, not just from forums in general, but from Tori fandom all together.
    Same! My fandom has decreased so much over the last few years but I always love new album time simply because of the posts and reviews! It enhances my fandom!
    chillin in kyoto grand with my man Skrill

  6. #126
    Senior Member Venus_Envy's Avatar
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    Absolutely gutted to see this place close! I will miss coming here to see the reactions to new material, live setlist freak outs and the general wonderment that has made it so great. I’m not active on the Facebook groups, because I mostly find them over run with idiots. Especially the cretin that recently told me that “Mr. Bad Man” is better than “Northern Lad”; are these people for fucking real!?

    Thanks to the admin team for keeping this great forum going. It will be greatly missed!!
    ~just an underwater thing~

  7. #127
    Senior Member lettyt's Avatar
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    sniffles

    I've never been much of a poster but have been a lurker since, geez, before the forum migration to here, and I remember following every album from Scarlet's Walk onward on this forum. Today I'm feeling nostalgic and sad about the passing of time and realize this is the place where I come when I want to keep in touch with my old self, with that girl in her room listening to boys for pele and memorizing the lyrics and analyzing the pictures. Now I'm a writer and a therapist and a mother and have so many responsibilities in my life, but I love going back into that slowed down, analytical, nostalgic mode of feeling connected to music and wanting to hear everybody else's interpretations and thoughts and feelings. I will really miss this place and talking Tori & Kate & Fiona &, in my case, Neko & Suzanne Vega & Courtney Love & Beyonce & some newer artists, like Angel Olson or St. Vincent.
    Last edited by lettyt; 11-17-2019 at 05:11 AM.
    I miss, I miss,/how you'd sigh yourself to sleep
    When I raked the springtime /across your sheets

  8. #128
    the druthers Mordecai's Avatar
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    So what'd I miss? Oh fuck

  9. #129
    Let them eat cheese flan Nancy's Avatar
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    Not at all suggesting that anyone else should do this, but there are some bright sides in my experience of moving over to Facebook. If you post a pic of yourself with your head photoshopped on top of Tori Amos's body from American Doll Posse, your elderly cousin from Argentina might share it with her family with the message: "DOESN'T NANCY LOOK GREAT?"

    I kid you not, when I saw that, I stopped filtering anybody out of my posts for the rest of time.

  10. #130
    but Nancy, you DO look great!
    Remember that we once lived

  11. #131
    Alt Universe CliqueMember Spikey's Avatar
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    This world is doomed. But so is Facebook. Which one will give in first? Will that be on a monday?
    "Replies are a combination of nonsense, unrelated comments and inside jokes"‎

  12. #132
    Let them eat cheese flan Nancy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Faust View Post
    but Nancy, you DO look great!
    That's why I decided not to argue with them. I only hope the born-again Christian wannabe boyfriend who refused my advances in 1982 thought the same thing.

  13. #133
    Senior Member Jezebelle's Avatar
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    Wait - wasn't it supposed to close in January? The front page says June...
    chillin in kyoto grand with my man Skrill

  14. #134
    Let them eat cheese flan Nancy's Avatar
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    It's next year. I suspect the time will go by fast, but we have plenty of time to say goodbye here first.

  15. #135
    She has a plan for that. Steve SFM's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jezebelle View Post
    Wait - wasn't it supposed to close in January? The front page says June...
    June is correct.

    Hey, Mordecai!
    And it's going to be how do we think government should work and who do we think government should work for?

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